Yep, you read it right. I went sunbathing in La Union together with our friends instead of doing what I naturally loved to do there before — surfing.
It was a very sad moment for me when I realized that I haven’t overcome the trauma I got from my near death experience last December 2007. I felt a mixture of chilling fright, panic and severe anxiety the moment wavy waters reached up to my knees. I tried to fight my fear several times by trying to body board, with Peter and our friends just inches away from me. But still, the traumatic emotions were too much that I just totally gave up trying and just sunbathed the rest of our stay there. I felt so melancholic…. I didn’t even want to blog about it. I felt so down… I went on a sex binge with my husband the moment we got home.
Anyway, I know this is my blog and I have every right to go into detail about this not-so-happy weekend rendezvous. But in fairness to our friends, who I’m sure had a great time, I’ll try to limit the negativity on this post. But if in case I do go overboard, just keep in mind that these are just my feelings which need an outlet. And what better place to express them than here on my own diary, right?
To drown my sorrows, I spent a while tinkering with Nikki (my Nikon D40) during the early morning of our second day. I walked all the way to the other side of the beach, taking photos of whatever seemed interesting. It’s been a long time since I was last alone with Nikki. I rarely use it to the point that people call it Peter’s D40 when in fact I was the one who bought it for myself, with my own money, with the intention of learning how to take good photos. My blood actually boils when I hear people call it Peter’s camera (I’m very possessive that way). Partly because I am selfish and also because it just means that I never get to use it as much as I’d like to. Hopefully, my trip to Indonesia will change all that.
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